Posted in October 2007

Happy Halloween!

I get a lot of corny email jokes from my mom but this one is actually funny.

A cabbie picks up a Nun.

She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY
handsome cab driver won’t stop staring at her.

She asks him why he is staring.

He replies: “I have a question to ask you but I don’t
want to offend you.”

She answers, “My son, you cannot offend me. When
you’re as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I
have, you get a chance to see and hear just about
everything. I’m sure that there’s nothing you could
say or ask that I would find offensive.”

“Well, I’ve always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss
me.”

She responds, “Well, let’s see what we can do about
that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be
Catholic.”

The cab driver is very excited and says, “Yes, I’m
single and Catholic!”

“OK” the nun says. “Pull into the next alley.”

The nun fulfills his fantasy, with a kiss that would
make a hooker blush

But when they get back on the road, the cab driver
starts crying.

“My dear child,” says the nun, “why are you crying?”

“Forgive me but I’ve sinned. I lied and I must
confess, I’m married and I’m Jewish.”

The nun says, “That’s OK . My name is Kevin and I’m
going to a Halloween party.”

Hot Off The Presses!

Normally I wouldn’t resort to reporting crass stories like the following but on the day before Halloween, how can anyone resist this headline?

Man in N.J. Charged with Having Sex with a Corpse

From 1010 WINS:

“TEANECK, N.J. (1010 WINS) — Police in Teaneck arrested a man for allegedly having sex with a corpse. 

Anthony Merino, a 24-year-old lab technician, was arrested Sunday after a security guard saw him having sex with a dead 92-year-old woman in the Holy Name Hospital morgue, police said. The suspect works part time at Holy Name Hospital, holds a full time job at Overlook Hospital and another part time position at Bio Reference Labs in New Jersey.

Merino is charged with desecrating human remains in the second degree. His bail has been set at $400,000.

Merino is also expected to undergo a psychological evaluation and is restricted from working in a health care facility.”

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Mean Spirited Monday

Every Monday morning I post a picture of some random celebrity, or non-celebrity for you to comment on. Remember to have fun and be mean spirited with your comments.

Recently I told you that I don’t care about or pay any attention to sports. So you know it must be bad when even I’m commenting on a sport-related item.

Last week, Rudy Giuliani informed a crowd at a stop on the campaign trail in MA that he is rooting for the Red Socks. I can only hope that this two-faced act will show the rest of the country why most New Yorkers have always despised him.

So, here he is, former (thank god) NYC Mayor and presidential-praying piece of shit, Rudy Giuliani, let the meanness begin!

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Sold!


As long as everything stays on track, we should be closing on our new Columbia County home soon.

Pissing Me Off Today

the obese woman on the train this morning who didn’t think it would be necessary for her to move out of the doorway when the train stopped at 34th street to let half the passengers off the car. I wonder what would have happened if I shouted out loud what I was thinking in my head – “Move it fat ass”!

my morning coffee-cart guy who is MIA today. Not only does he sell the best coffee in this neighborhood but he is conveniently located directly outside my building entrance. This weak garbage that I was forced to go out of my way for is no substitute.

the mindless PR tool whose idiotic emails I have to take time to respond to.

It’s really turning out to be one hell of a morning!

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